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Читалочка. Robert E. Howard, A Gent From Bear Creek

Только что увидела в ленте, посмотрела в переводе, нашла оригинал - ааа, прелесть какая! До чего же я обожаю американские диалекты, особенно те, которые лично слышала, и могу себе представить носителя, вот это все выдающего. :)))) Недоковбой такой, мальчишка-забияка, ну один в один "красношеий" из Западной Вирджинии. И таки да, мне там все понятно, и я прусь! foxy_helen, спасибо!!!

Лежит в открытом доступе в австралийском Гутенберге.

http://gutenberg.net.au/ebooks06/0608611.txt

Буду под дзиньку складывать для себя цитаты оттуда на английском, кому интересно - милости прошу, переводить ЭТО я не в силах, это как... песнь жаворонка или там брачный рев гамадрила...



Chapter I - STRIPED SHIRTS AND BUSTED HEARTS

And impulsively shattering her water bucket over my head she
turned and run up the trail.

"Glory, wait!" I hollered, but by the time I got the water out of
my eyes and the oak splinters out of my hair she was gone.

Alexander was gone too. He taken off down the creek when Glory
started yelling at me, because he was a smart mule in his dumb way,
and could tell when thunder-showers was brewing.

It plumb busts my heart strings to let her go, and nothin' but
greenbacks is goin' to soothe the sting!

"What could you offer me,
you mountain of beef and ignorance?"

"A bust in the snoot, you old tightwad," I replied heatedly, but
still remembering to be diplomatic. They warn't no use in offending
him, and I was determined to talk quiet and tranquil, in spite of his
insults. So I said: "A man which would sell his datter for five
dollars and a gun ought to be et alive by the buzzards! You try to
marry Glory to Mister Wilkinson and see what happens to you, sudden
and onpleasant!"

"Lemme handle him," snarled Mister Wilkinson. "Git outa the way
and gimme a clean shot at him. Lissen here, you jack-eared mountain-
mule, air you goin' out of here perpendicular, or does you prefer to
go horizontal?"

You may be accounted a
fast gunslinger down in the low country, but yo're tolerable slow on
the draw to be foolin' around Bear Creek.

just as I opened my mouth to do it, John jammed the butt-end of a
table laig into it.

Sech treatment would try the patience of a saint, still and all I
didn't really intend to hit John as hard as I did. How was I to know a
tap like I give him would knock him through the door and dislocate his
jawbone?

I couldn't see what was going on outside, and Old Man McGraw was
chawing my thumb and feeling for my eye, so I throwed him after John
and Bill, and he's a liar when he said I aimed him at that rain-barrel
a-purpose.

So I run out at
the door and Glory met me just as I hit the yard and she give me a
slap in the face that sounded like a beaver hitting a mud bank with
his tail.

f you really loved me you wouldn't of hurt 'em!
You jest done it for meanness! I told you to be ca'm and gentle!
Whyn't you do it? Shet up! Don't talk to me! Well, whyn't you say
somethin'? Ain't you got no tongue?

I advises you to marry that young grizzly there, for the sake of public
safety, if nothin' else! Marry you when _he_ wants you? No, thank you!
I'm leavin' a valuable finger as a sooverneer of my sojourn, but I
figger it's a cheap price! After watchin' that human tornado in
action, I calculate a finger ain't nothin' to bother about! _Adios!_
If I ever come within a hundred miles of Bear Creek again it'll be
because I've gone plumb loco!"

And with that he forked his critter and took off up the trail like
the devil was after him.


Tags: Читалочка, Юморинки
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